Life thus far

So, my NLG (non lesbian girlfriend) and I just moved in to our first apartment. We are products of Suburbia and Daddy always taking care of us. As you can imagine, we have run into a lot of situations where we were clueless. Here is a quick run-down of some of them:

• ROACHES (We later learned they are water bugs. Equally as gross.)

• Moving/arranging furniture



• Hanging mirrors, picture, decorations (required frantic call to our sometimes "house husband")



• Scary high school girls threatening innocent commuters on subway



• A women's drug overdose, resulting in mouth foaming, subway car evacuation, termination of normal commute



• Frigidness due to the fact that our landlord pays the heating bill



• Going out in the city and being hit on by D and the "best DJ in the world"



• City parking, with the occasional bumper tap



• Parking tickets


• SPIDERS (NLG got quite the bite, we are about to bug bomb our apartment)

There will be more to come...I promise.