Halloween Happenings

Odin (NLG's fish) goes for a ride in my car (to Tiki's) because we BUG BOMBED.



Tiki (sometimes house husband) contemplates a tattoo. We went to this super cute parlor in Bay Ridge on Halloween!

The Newest Addition to Our Home...Our Giant Green Chair

Hello All! NLG here, writing my first blog post EVER! I haven't really been keeping up with the blog except to tell Wasp to take pictures of things to post (ie: our "steak dinner"). So when I got to work today and checked it, I was shocked that she failed to tell all of you about our furniture delivery last Thursday (read as: the Wasp almost killed me/the night we almost threw our backs out).

So...my aunt is moving and had a whole bunch of stuff to give us (if it weren't for her and our parents our apartment would be empty...we wouldn't even have a kitchen table). She sent a moving guy, we'll call him "Willy" and he brought this guy with him, we'll call him "Hands". So the drive all the way to us in a pick up truck laden down with a ton of stuff: a desk for Wasp, a GIGANTIC green leather chair and ottoman (my favorite piece of furniture of all time), a new smallish TV stand, a love seat and an adorable magazine rack. So Willy and Hands get to our apartment and call us to tell us they are downstairs and we run down to meet them. When we opened the front door, Willy already had the ottoman on his head, ready to carry it to the second floor.

I was put in charge of "watching the truck" (they had parked illegally in front of our building) and Wasp went up stairs to tell them where to put everything. An hour later, everything was unloaded, Willy and Hands were on their way home and I went upstairs and found Wasp standing in the middle of our living room which now looked like we had just moved in (again).

The love seat didn't fit in our living room and is now in my bedroom covered by a hot pink blanket to make it match the rest of my room. And, the green chair is gigantic. Like, you can fit two people in it comfortably. Our living room is not that big and I remembered this chair being a lot smaller (lesson learned: how big a room is makes a difference when you remember the size of a piece of furniture). It took Wasp and I more than forty minutes and about 9 different arrangements to fine one that looked decent. The ottoman and the chair are separate, they wouldn't fit together, and Wasp and I moved everything all by ourselves...sans the normal male figures in our lives who were busy that night.

Needless to say after all of this, we were too busy to cook and were forced to order Chinese and lay in our living room watching Grey's Anatomy. The story does not end here, though...while watching McSteamy and McDreamy on the screen, I started to get itchy. I went to my room and changed into my PJs only to discover, I exaggerate not, a dozen mosquito bites all over my arms and legs. Then I went to wash my face and found about six more. I looked like a had developed a deadly skin condition.

Lessons learned:
1. giant pieces of furniture should be considered carefully when your apartment is small
2. Willy and Hands can lift almost anything
3. Wasp and I are not completely unable to fend for ourselves (though we do whine when we have to)
4. Chinese food and McDreamy makes an awesome end to a Thursday night
5. Mosquito bites do not. Do not stand under the light on your stoop for forty minutes in Brooklyn. The mosquitoes are particularly aggressive.

More to come...

Dinner

We become very proud of ourselves when we manage to have a semi balanced meal. Steak, rice (which we made way too much of and over cooked) and snow peas (which were perfection). NLG makes snow peas in the microwave in a bowl of water with a paper towel cover (she calls it "steaming).

Anywho, it was delicious.

Vom Commute

My morning email from NLG:

Note to self: only share water with stranger when you have another beverage to consume for the duration of the day. Fail. No water for me today because I have to go home to sanitize my brandnew water bottle.

Ugh. Passing out on the train=bad news for everyone involved.

See you tonight,

xo,
NLG

Because!!

Everything was fine until we started crossing the Manhattan Bridge, and then "BOOM! THUD" Cute, thin, hipster girl is on the floor, white as a ghost passed out. She laid there for what seemed like a full minute until the lady next to her helped her up, she finally came to. A passenger yelled "don't pull the emergency break!" but alas, someone already had. I learned today that the emergency break is worthless unless you are in a subway station. (Makes sense, the emergency personnel can get their quicker/easier).

The woman sat the girl down and she took her jacket off. She was still very pale, but had just obviously overheated. The MTA lady came back to fix the break, checked on the girl, all was fine. NLG goes over to girl and lets her sip on her NEVER BEEN USED water bottle. Very nice of her.

Girl gets off a few stops before us, roommate saved the day.

NYC commute, always something to talk about.

Obama's in NYC!??

As I got out of the subway today, this is what I saw! This doesn't even capture half of it. There were at least 20 cops/fireman and 8 fire trucks..all at one subway stop! I'm not sure what happened.

Each corner I passed there was a traffic cop directing traffic.

My supervisor told me he was speaking at Fairleigh Dickonson, but most likely staying in the city.

I don't know, it looked pretty serious..more than just a presidential visit.

My roommate: columnist extraordinaire

me: he said YES

omg omg omgomgomgomgomg

NLG: YAY

YAY YAY YAY

me: YOU ARE AN EXCELLENT ADVICE GIVER

NLG: I SHOULD HAVE A COLUMN

me: yessssssssssssss

OMG I'M DYING LAUGHIN

NLG: WHY ARE WE YELLING?

me: THAT IS SOOOO TRUE

hahahaahahha

b/c we are exciiiited

hahahahhahahah

NLG: PUT IT IN THE BLOG

me: hahahaha

what?

that exchange??

or ur column?

NLG: the exchange

lol

me: will do

the blog is mostly for our amusement

Today's Commute

An Email I received from my NLG this morning, on my way to work (she left earlier than me this morning.)

"I love when I get wedged in the middle seat between two sleeping men, and the one to my left is muttering/singing to himself. Note to self: when contemplating sitting in middle seat, perhaps it is just better to stand."

Life thus far

So, my NLG (non lesbian girlfriend) and I just moved in to our first apartment. We are products of Suburbia and Daddy always taking care of us. As you can imagine, we have run into a lot of situations where we were clueless. Here is a quick run-down of some of them:

• ROACHES (We later learned they are water bugs. Equally as gross.)

• Moving/arranging furniture



• Hanging mirrors, picture, decorations (required frantic call to our sometimes "house husband")



• Scary high school girls threatening innocent commuters on subway



• A women's drug overdose, resulting in mouth foaming, subway car evacuation, termination of normal commute



• Frigidness due to the fact that our landlord pays the heating bill



• Going out in the city and being hit on by D and the "best DJ in the world"



• City parking, with the occasional bumper tap



• Parking tickets


• SPIDERS (NLG got quite the bite, we are about to bug bomb our apartment)

There will be more to come...I promise.